i somehow love my memories.
i really do. =)
Hello boy it's been awhile
Guess you'll be glad to know
That I've learned how to laugh and smile
Getting over you was slow
They say old lovers can be good friends
But I never thought I'd really see you,
I'd really see you again
I go crazy
When I look in your eyes I still go crazy
No my heart just can't hide that old feelin' inside
Way deep down inside
Oh baby, you know when I look in your eyes I go crazy
You say she satisfies your mind
Tells you all of her dreams
I know how much that means to you
I realize that I was blind
Just when I thought I was over you
I see your face and it just ain't true
No it just ain't true
I go crazy
When I look in your eyes I still go crazy
That old flame comes alive, it starts burning inside
Way deep down inside
Oh baby, you know when I look in your eyes I go crazy
Your subtleties
They strangle me
I can't explain myself at all.
And all the wants
And all the needs
All I don't want to need at all.
The walls start breathing
My mind's unweaving
Maybe it's best you leave me alone.
A weight is lifted
On this evening
I give the final blow.
When darkness turns to light,
It ends tonight
It ends tonight.
A falling star
Least I fall alone.
I can't explain what you can't explain.
You're finding things that you didn't know
I look at you with such disdain
The walls start breathing
My mind's unweaving
Maybe it's best you leave me alone.
A weight is lifted
On this evening
I give the final blow.
When darkness turns to light
It ends tonight,
It ends tonight.
Just a little insight won't make this right
It's too late to fight
It ends tonight,
It ends tonight.
Now I'm on my own side
It's better than being on your side
It's my fault when you're blind
It's better that I see it through your eyes
All these thoughts locked inside
Now you're the first to know
How much is real, so much to question
An epidemic of the mannequins
contaminating everything
We thought came from the heart,
But never did right from the start
Just listen to the noises (no more sad voices)
Before you tell yourself
It's just a different scene
Remember its just different from what you've seen.
I'm looking at you through the glass
Don't know how much time has passed
And All I know is that it feels like forever
But no one ever tells you that forever feels like home,
sitting all alone inside your head
Cause I'm looking at you through the glass
Don't know how much time has passed
And all I know is that it feels like forever
But no one ever tells you that forever feels like home,
sitting all alone inside your head
And it's the stars
The stars that shine for you
And it's the stars
The stars that lie to you Yeah-yeah
I'm looking at you through the glass
Don't know how much time has passed
o god it feels like forever
But no one ever tells you that forever feels like home,
sitting all alone inside your head
Cause I'm looking at you through the glass
Don't know how much time has passed
And all I know is that it feels like forever
But no one ever tells you that forever feels like home,
sitting all alone inside your head
And it's the stars
The stars that shine for you Yeah-yeah
And it's the stars
The stars that lie to you Yeah-yeah
And it's the stars
The stars that shine for you Yeah-yeah
And it's the stars
The stars that lie to you Yeah-yeah
Who are the stars?
Who are the stars?
They lie…
You could be happy and I won't know
But you weren't happy the day I watched you go
And all the things that I wish I had not said
Are played in loops 'till it's madness in my head
Is it too late to remind you how we were
But not our last days of silence, screaming, blur
Most of what I remember makes me sure
I should have stopped you from walking out the door
You could be happy, I hope you are
You made me happier than I'd been by far
Somehow everything I own smells of you
And for the tiniest moment it's all not true
Do the things that you always wanted to
Without me there to hold you back, don't think, just do
More than anything I want to see you go
Take a glorious bite out of the whole world
and the tears i shed for u is more than
wad i would shed in a dozen years.
I’m sober now for 3 whole months it’s one accomplishment that you helped me with
The one thing that always tore us apart is the one thing I won’t touch again
In my sick way I want to thank you for holding my head up late at night
While I was busy waging wars on myself, you were trying to stop the fight
You never doubted my warped opinions on things like suicidal hate
You made me compliment myself when it was way too hard to take
So I’ll drive so fucking far away that I never cross your mind
And do whatever it takes in your heart to leave me behind
Hate me today
Hate me tomorrow
Hate me for all the things I didn’t do for you
Hate me in ways
Yeah ways hard to swallow
Hate me so you can finally see what’s good for you
And with a sad heart I say bye to you and wave
Kicking shadows on the street for every mistake that I had made
And like a baby boy I never was a man
Until I saw your blue eyes cry and I held your face in my hand
And then I fell down yelling “Make it go away!”
Just make a smile come back and shine just like it used to be
And then she whispered “How can you do this to me?”
army daze.
i realised that the army is a damn waste of time..
lol but im rather lucky to get nice ppl in my bunk
and gd frens in my platoon.. cant believe there
was Loo Julian Benwai Leon QJ along with many others.
its fun la, probably cos Falcon Coy is slack..???
finished live firing alrdy, that means i can hold
real bullets and a old faulty screwd up M16.
Kaden jason aaron and all are in sch 2, and i barely see them in camp... but according to them, my life is damn slack n welfare in camp... mayb so la, my SGTs are nice
and the officers are not too retarded and psycho too..
but army is really making me sick n tired of tekong
and the routine waits and stuffs... its damaging my
brain and my life and etc. 2yrs outta civilisation,
making me into a killing machine..
blame ur parents and ancestors for voting for the PAP,
cos that'sthe reason why we haf to serve NS.
+)
good bye civilisation.
08april06...
1430hr....
tekong....
pls takecare.
everything will be find.
april 4th, 2340hr.
Less than 4days of civilisation left
so much to do, so little time.
is this the end?
im really afraid, the burden might be too much
welcome to the world
One is all, all is one.
am i suppose to be selfish or continue
in a tied up controlled world
i only haf 3days left. and there goes half my life, i
want get things moving along..
to be able to make frens happy and make things work
selfish, is jus another way to show importance
u are nothing without sacrifices and choices
my world is so full of it, that im sick
everything is jus so complicated
So when will this end it goes on and on
Over and over and over again
Keep spinning around I know that it won't stop
Till I step down from this for good
I never thought I'd end up here
Never thought I'd be standing where I am
I guess I kinda thought it would be easier than this
I guess I was wrong now one more time
Now look at me
Instead of moving on, I refuse to see
That I keep coming back
And I'm stuck in a moment
That wasn't meant to last (to last)
I've tried to fight it
Can't deny it
You don't even know
'Cause I am hanging on every word you say
And even if you don't want to speak tonight
That's alright, alright with me
Do you ever wonder
What sky I'm lying under
Do you ever think of me
Does your heart remember
How we used to feel
When it used to think of me
All I need to know
When you're on your own
Do you miss what might have been
World don't stop turning
Stars don't stop falling down
In my world of make believe
Do you ever think of me
We got different stories
And all our never endings now
Even thought your heart is free
Still my heart wont let me be
Do you ever think of me
clouds n fog aside
everything is much more on the plate
and maybe then no one can start
having misunderstandings and misconceptions
cos this is definitely not what we want
=)
Hello lonely
How you doin' today?
Hello sweet thing
Why don't you walk this way?
Hello, you again
How could you go and be so cold?
She said "Goodbye sad man"
Cuz all this pain is getting old
Hello lonely
Now that you're gone I can move on
Goodbye sweet thing
Just know that I've been here all along
"life is unfair", how cliche
but how true..
u are never remembered for ur heroics
but always remembered for ur mistakes
one mistake can strip u of all ur previous gains
sometimes i wonder how unfair it is that
ur perception of another person can change
over what was much more important
maybe its fun that was important, not friendship
in that case maybe we arent the type of ppl
u nid to be with rite now
forget bout the blue skies, beautiful crashing waves
and the all so soothing moonlight gazing down across
the shore.
right now its the volcanic rocks flooding the place
the toxic waste and litter filled over the polluted
waters and the gloomy nites.
selfish
i am
sometimes i really wish i would get inside ur head
for a moment to know exactly what is going on
because im so insecure that maybe i might
start hallucinating about what could never be
trapped in my own agendas, i didnt try to make
anything better. and at the end of the day if i
breakdown, ive no one to blame but myself
cos' i never knew that things could turn out
this way.
You and I got something
But it's all and then it's nothing to me, yeah
And I got my defenses
When it comes to your intentions for me, yeah
And we wake up in the breakdown
Of the things we never thought we could be, yeah
I'm not the one who broke you
I'm not the one you should fear
We got to move you darling
I thought I lost you somewhere
But you were never really ever there at all
You said it’s over,
I said that’s ok,
I wasn’t into you anyway,
I told you lately,
You irritate me,
Your laugh is too loud,
You’re the last girl I’d look at,
If you were in a crowd,
Could you tell?
I was lying,
And hiding the truth away,
And what I really wanted to say is,
You are incredible,
You are amazing,
You blow my mind,
One of a kind,
I’m having a melt down,
You are incredible,
You are amazing,
But sometimes telling the truth,
Is easier said than done,
Don’t leave baby,
Now that’s what I meant to say.
My worlds not ending,
I’ll be just fine,
That’s what my mouth said,
But not what I felt inside,
Ooh, I told you baby,
You’re not the answer,
To all of my prayers,
Coz I like my girlfriends,
In short skirts with longer hair,
Wondering the streets, in a world underneath it all
Nothing seems to be, nothing tastes as sweet
As what I can't have
Like you and the way that you're twisting your hair
round your finger
Tonight I'm not afraid to tell you
What I feel about you.
I'm gonna muster every ounce of confidence I have
and cannon ball into the water
I'm gonna muster every ounce of confidence I have
For you I will
For you I will
Forgive if I studder
From all of the clutter in my head
Cuz I could fall asleep in those eyes
Like a water bed
Do I seem familiar, i've crossed you in hallways
a thousand times, no more camouflauge
I want to be exposed, and not be afraid to fall.
I'm gonna muster every ounce of confidence I have
And cannon ball into the water
I'm gonna muster every ounce of confidence I have
For you I will
You always want what you can't have
But I've got to try
I'm gonna muster every ounce of confidence I have
For you I will
For you
If I could dim the lights in the mall
And create a mood I would
Shout out your name so it echos in every room
That's what I'd do, That's what I'd do to get through to you
i crossed my own line
hurt ppl i love
and having to live wif the consequences
of reckless or rash actions
i jus felt that mayb i could haf
had a better hold of myself
havent really been typing anything substantial
its not been all smooth sailing for anyone
well, i guess life was never about having smooth journey
things have been changing around me
ppl changing, even if they don’t, sometimes dey are forced to
new people, new friends entering our lives
and sometimes, everytime a new fren enters ur life,
u somewhat lose a fren at the other end
its sad but, its true, no pain no gain.
and its not that simple as adapting to ur new schedules
its get way complicated when U start adapting to another fren’s schedule
everyone has their own aims, their own priorities
many things come into consideration..
im glad my really good friends haf found that extra special
person in their lives, its probably the best thing that gets u
going each day when u wake up in the morning
someone who can make u feel happier than u ever felt
so yea, everyone has a life they call their own now,
mayb its time I move on, chase my own dreams
find my own goals, demand more from myself
ive let many people down
its not fair, I don’t like it…
mayb ive been too selfish and blinded by my own childish dreams
of playing professionally in sports, cos its
simply not feasible in Singapore…
and im jus not good enough either…
Enough of me and myself, its time to do what people would
like to see me doing, and not what I like doing.
its not jus about me anymore, its about u
I want you to know it's a little fucked up,
That I'm stuck here waitin', no longer debatin',
Tired of sittin' and hatin' and makin' these excuses,
For while you're not around, and feeling so useless,
It seems one thing has been true all along,
You don't really know what you got 'til it's gone,
I guess I've had it with you and your career,
When you come back I won't be here and you'll can sing it...
there are somethings in life that u want
but can never achieve
and there are somethings that u have achieved
that u do not want
but u would never know it till u lose it
and there are always the small things in life
which so narrows ur view of the situation
and u end up telling everyone
"i wanna be selfish"
and it's so difficult to make the choice
sometimes, mayb i shld jus sit on the fence
b'cos the world is at equilibrium right now
and i shld not upset anything which are in balanced
maybe things should jus remain as it is
but then again, isn't tell selfish too
when u mix problems together, u can never solve any of them
with one solution.
so maybe lets jus leave it to the rest of the world
and forces of nature.
and i really wanna sleep now.
complicated lives we live
simple matters made complicated
or matters complicated simple lives
i guess this is where we come to
but if u dont want to
u dont hafta believe me
did i screw up?
i guess i did.
sorry
Im no hero, you remember how i was, you know
All i ever did was worry, feeling out of control
To the point where everything was going end over end
Im spinning around in circles again
This is where you come in
All of this to explain to you why
I had to separate myself away from yesterday's life
Please remember this isn't how i hoped it would be
But i had to protect you from me
Thats why i slipped out the back before you knew i was there
I know you felt unprepared
But every single time i was around i just bring you down
And i could tell that it was time to be scared
Thats why i slipped out the back before you knew i was there
And i know the way i left wasnt fair
I didnt want to be around just to bring you down
Im not a hero but dont think i didnt care
Look at us baby, up all night
Tearing our love apart
Aren't we the same two people who live
Through years in the dark?
Every time I try to walk away
Something makes me turn around and stay
And I can't tell you why
When we get crazy,
It just ain't to right,
Girl, I get lonely, too
You don't have to worry
Just hold on tight
cause I love you
Nothing's wrong as far as I can see
We make it harder than it has to be
And I can't tell you why
No, baby, I can't tell you why
I can't tell you why
Numb is the new deep
Done with the old me
And talk is the same cheap it's been
Is there a God?
Why is he waiting?
Don't you think of it odd
When he knows my address
And look at the stars
Don’t it remind you just how feeble we are?
Well it used to, I guess
Cause ever since I’ve tried
Trying not to find
Every little meaning in my life
It’s been fine, I’ve been cool
With my new golden rule
I'm a new man
I wear a new cologne
And you wouldn’t know me
If your eyes were closed
I know what you’ll say
‘This won't last longer than the rest of the day’
But you’re wrong this time
You’re wrong
lol made a huge mess at kaden's place on sat nite.
we shld nvr play social wif 4ppl i tell u.
tt's the last time we're gonna do it. ahahah
aidan is the best la
he causes zero damage, he jus goes to slp.
oh well. darn bored.
why am i still bumming when i shld get a job
nvm, ahtanie says job discussion at 2pm todae.
ahaha hope its gd.
its really tough to find a job, cos ya when u tell the
person 2mths or 3mths working period
they will say.
'thank u come again'
so yea, it darn bad, guess ill jus concentrate
on u21 compeition
gotta win some stuff, cant take it anymore
oh well, days are passing by fast, n really
njoyed the company of great frens..
we shld xbox n swim more at kaden's hse
and aidan, if we going gym, u gotta wear shoes!
lol
Faraway...I feel your beating heart
All Alone
beneath the crystal stars
Staring into space
What a lonely face
I'll try to find my place with you
What a beautiful smile
Can I stay for awhile?
On this beautiful night
We'll make everything right
My beautiful love
Maybe a greater thing will happen
Maybe all will see
Maybe your love will catch like fire
As it burns through me
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welcome to my life.
ouch
ouch
ouch
i deserve this cos i did nothing
and im feeling like this cos i did shit
but would i even feel better if i did something
i dont noe.
pls scream for me,
cos there is no other way i would move along
its too hard for me to handle
and its getting harder n harder to breathe
And I'd give up forever to touch you
'Cause I know that you feel me somehow
You're the closest to heaven that I'll ever be
And I don't want to go home right now
And all I can taste is this moment
And all I can breathe is your life
and sooner or later it's over
I just don't want to miss you tonight
And I don't want the world to see me
'Cause I don't think that they'd understand
When everything's made to be broken
I just want you to know who I am
And you can't fight the tears that ain't coming
Or the moment of truth in your lies
When everything feels like the movies
Yeah, you bleed just to know you're alive
life aint screwed up
we screwed life up ourselves
9th Jan at GASHAUS
619 get low' @ GAS HAUS
114 middle road #01-00
(Oppo Bugis)
9 JAN * NEXT MONDAY
(eve of HariRaya)
Presale Goin at $16
inclusive of ONE FREE DRINK
HIPHOP/R&B ALL NIGHT LONG.
feat DJ ANDREW.
you gotta hear his groove to understand
the TRUE meaning of HIPHOP&RNB.
He sets a TOTALLY DIFFERENT MUSIC
culture.
He's the only one for HIP&RNB.
HOT DRINKS DEALS !
one-4-one from 11-12am & 1am - 2am
Jugs goin at 30$ only ~
spirits are @ $7
there's always the PARTY STARTER.
so let this be IT.
These memories are playing like a film without sound
And I keep thinking of the night in June
I didn't know much of love, but it came too soon
And there was me and you, and then it got real blue
Stay at home talkin' on the telephone and
We would get so excited, we'd get so scared
Laughing at our selves thinking life's not fair
And this is how it feels
As we go on, we remember
All the times we had together
And as our lives change,
Come whatever
We will still be, friends forever
So if we get the big jobs and we make the big money
When we look back now, will that joke still be funny?
Will we still remember everything we learned in school?
Still be trying to break every single rule
Will little brainy Bobby be the stockbroker man?
Can Heather find a job that won't interfere with her tan?
I keep, I keep thinking that it's not goodbye
Keep on thinking it's a time to flyy
And this is how it feels
Will we think about tomorrow like we think about now?
Can we survive it out there? Can we make it somehow?
I guess I thought that this would never end
And suddenly it's like we're women and men
Will the past be a shadow that will follow us 'round?
Will these memories fade when I leave this town
I keep, I keep thinking that it's not goodbye
Keep on thinking it's a time to fly
is life a learning process
or is life a torture
because the way im living it
it feels like heaven n hell co-existing in my world
somedays the sky seems blue, puffy cloud would roam by
other days it seems to be gloomy and all that
surrounds me is regrets and a stinging feeling of sadness
ill never be good enough
because this aint my type of game
i dont even noe my reason for living
im not in this world for fame
mayb i should jus start believeing
that everything i dreamed of would stay a dream
i find peace when
i'm confused
i find hope when
i'm let down
not in me ... me
in You
it's in you
i hope to lose myself
for good
i hope to find it in the end
not in me ... me
in You ,in You
He who dwells in the secret place of the Most High Shall abide under the shadow of the Almighty.
For He shall give His angels charge over you, To keep you in all your ways.
Sometimes when things don't go your way...trust God because He always knows what's best for you...He always has better plans for you...and He...Never...Fails...
WELCOME TO THE SELFISH WORLD
ITS ALL ABOUT YOURSELF
Hello, good morning, how You do?
What makes Your risin' sun so new?
I could use a fresh beginning too
All of my regrets are nothing new
So this is a way, that I say I need You
This is a way
This is a way
That I'm learning to breathe
I'm learning to crawl
I'm finding that You and You alone can break my fall
I'm living again, awake and alive
I'm dying to breathe in these abundant skies
Hello, good morning, how You been?
Yesterday left my head kicked in
I never, never thought that
I would fall like that
Never knew that I could hurt this bad
Sometime wanna be your lover,
Sometime wanna be your friend
,
Sometime wanna hug ya,
Hold hands, slow-dance while the record spins
sometimes i jus wanna let u go
sometimes wanna see u again
sometimes its all messed up
sometimes i wish i could meet u all over again
cos u made me notice all over again
how beautiful the world is when i look
into you eyes
but u would never know that would u.
really nothing much to say.
ahaha life's a blessing or a curse
i dont know, u decide.
a white xmas? =)
am i ever gonna find out
am i ever gonna find out
i guess not
14/12/2005
-how your eyes captivates me- @2:21 pm
I tried to be perfect, but nothing was worth it
I don't believe it makes me real
I thought it'd be easy, but no one believes me
I meant all the things that I said.
If you believe it's in my soul
I'd say all the words that I know
Just to see if it would show
That I'm trying to let you know
That I'm better off on my own.
This place is so empty
My thoughts are so tempting
I don't know how it got so bad
Sometimes it's so crazy
That nothing can save me,
But it's the only thing that I have.
irresponsible ppl.
cant even get shit done.
like really how bout wtf
http://www.imagestation.com/album/?id=2116791442
pic pls =)
photos pls..?
thanks to whitney, i dont hafta go alone, yay...
but i cant walk tooooo
could slp well yday nite, dont know why..
for those who know me, i not slping well
is a miracle, a landmark in history.
i got a freaking bad cramp at like 5am in the morning,
i work up wif my leg killing me, it was damn painful
shld haf warmed down from soccer, im kinda dying soon.
tml's gonna be freaking dismal
cos aiya, dont know lah, zZzzz
suppose to get some stuffs done, but
am i suppose to go round alone.. i dont know
arh screw it, mayb ill jus make do wif
a solo effort. to travel and like go to town by myself..?
tt's qt loser.. but who cares, dont haf much of a choice
anywae.
yes yes, im making a life
A thousand other boys could never reach you
How could I have been the one
I saw the world spin beneath you
And scatter like ice from the spoon
That was your womb
Comin' down the world turned over
And angels fall without you there
And I go on as you get colder
Or are you someone's prayer
You know the lies they always told you
And the love you never knew
What's the things they never showed you
That swallowed the light from the sun
Inside your room, yeah
So hard to
Believe in things that you can't see yourself
See yourself
Behind the scene
Lies more than you can understand yourself
Stand yourself
And now they tell you what you want to hear
When they're done, will you still live in fear?
You're told that selfishness will guide your path
What will you do when that just doesn't last?
And everything you say to me will be on my knees
And everything you say to me will be on my knees
So hard to
Believe in you
I'm not quite clear
What I should do
And now I know that you're the only one
But do they know that you're the only one?
And I can't believe a thing you say
I can believe a thing you say
It's so hard to
Believe in things that you can't see
we want food.
Nothing much to do after As.
As is really damn absurb man.. first u're damn busy
then u are damn bored.. unless im rich..
if im rich then i can, like do anytink i want..
well, tis is really borrringgg.. rah...
I’ve been thinking, take me now, I’m in too far
Can’t stop feeling, doesn’t matter who you are
This could be my last goodbye
You could stay, I’ll be alright
I’ve been thinking, take me now, I’m in too far
If I might say, all of this seems to float away from...
Your lips when they’re kissing me, and your hips when leaving me for
The last time, I’m thinking of the first time, ohh
The first time, I’m thinking of the last time
Play it back, it’s going over and over
A lvls suck.
i dont see much of a gd point in it
it makes u disconnected and oblivious
to everything and everyone arnd u
everyone exhibits their ability to be selfish
it's jus damn dumb...
then u make ppl angsty and pissed off
and somehow mayb when u study tgt u can form a stronger frenship..
well, u can be happy u can be sad.
frens can be there to help
but when u're pissd? mayb frens suppose to be there to let
u vent it all out... then everyone gets pissed
how dumb can that get...
therefore As suck
okay, got lotsa things to do, since waiting for someone else
to do it is the mentality of most lazy ppl like me.
mayb i should do smth about it..
hotel bking done.
now soccer matches and all
overseas trip not done.
it's hard to satisfy everyone, and when everyone aint so
understanding and same in mentality, its worst..
one can claim that going to his hse is cool, another
might say its boring.. and then when u decide on smth
its hard to invite the crowd, cos somehow u might leave
some out. then when u do tell them, dey might say dey cant
make it or when u make last min changes, which at the
end of the day aint ur fault, ppl get pissed at u.
welcome to world.
im more stressed out at these than exams man.
its unfair.
even im hard to please.
Kevin Nolan - Five games as captain, five wins and four goals
for the man himself. At the moment, he can do no wrong.
at least gp wasnt that bad.
it was spot on
im beaten n battered
luck zero. brains zero. workrate zero.
results i deserve 20.
i dont know man, i got raped, owned and destroyed
the worst thing is , i bet im the only one who
feels like that. everyone must tink chem n math were
damn easy...
this calls for reinforcement, time to call on
economics for backup. at least its the only thing i passed
in the prelims. so it might be a gd thing to pin on..
plus its the only thing tt realli makes most sense to me..
im lazy, and im not kinda smart, tt adds up to
many many many Fs in the result slips.
like omg man. ok gp gp. first time i actually study for essay
i tink im not gonna make it to Uni man..
but i tink everyone, every teacher already knew that
a long time ago, they jus dont wanna tell me.
but nvm, i found out that secret..
and the eventual conclusion? IM SCREWED.
im jus happy go lucky, and ignorant, and immature
mayb when i grow up, ill jus start regretting,
but for the time being, lets jus move on with life,
no point tinking bout the future too much,
many things can happen over time, surprises,
ups and downs,luck and no luck, miracles and
disasters. im jus walking... and walking...
aidan n kaden probably make it to the U, that's gd.. yup..
im sorry i cant join ya all.
kinda wasted my time, and most imptly ur time.
sorry man.
time flies.
and the same line many would seem to rattle.
"i wish i started studying earlier.
i wish i studied harder
i wish.."
wad i wish for is that everyone jus do their best
ive nothing to ask for bcos is deserve nothing
whatever i get in the end would be more
than wad i deserve and how much more than that?
i wouldnt know.
this way it would be fair to ppl who worked hard.
cos i didnt
really thank kaden n aidan for trying to rescue me
at least i might only be suffering from broken bones
than death.
u guys really saved me, and WOKE me up. literally.
mayb if God smiles upon us, i might jus make it
cos u both would probably or definitely make it
and when i make it, we can start our all time plan
soccer at night at nus. hahaha. it's such a dream
right now. mayb it would remain one. mayb not.
mayb life is really pre-destined. i wish it was,
cos the way im controlling my life, im gonna
self destruct and flip eventually.
thanks man, studying tgt would be memorable..
but now.. its all up to God
only God will judge me
All you need is love, is a lie cause
We had love but we still said goodbye
Now we're tired, battered fighters
And it stings when it's nobody's fault
Cause there's nothin' to blame at the drop of your name
It's only the air you took and the breath you left
Searching all my days just to find you
I'm not sure who I'm looking for
I'll know it
When I see you
Until then, I'll hide in my bedroom
just staying up all night just to write
A love song for no one
I could have met you in a sandbox
I could have passed you on the sidewalk
Could I have missed my chance
And watched you walk away?
Oh no way
been stdying at nus library
it's a freaking gd place, i swear...
if only i discoverd the place like a month earlier
i probably be much much more well prepared than rite now
im in a total mess now.. grr..
bizzaarrreeee....
well nus is really cool...
it's like dreamland. cos it's gonna be jus a miracle
to get in, it's more than jus a dream,
it's untinkable.
No, don't say a word
Leave while you still can
Put out your light
Now I guess you're going
A figure through the door
And your taillights faded
Like twenty years before.
Now you come around
Now you come around
Just to hear your sounds
We are your beautiful,
We are your beautiful mistake
it's been a while since i last saw u.......
You're beautiful
you're confusing
you're illogical
you're amazing
and I've seen the world
it's overrated
until you're everything
I have nothing
but empty space
I've been down
this road before
all that I've found
points me right back to you
and I've watched you move
from down below
where do I go from here
I guess I'll find out as I go
25oct. it's down to like 14days.
i cant see myself doing well.
wad i can really see is....
im gonna get my results in march
go to lido sit down with frens
and start going "so how ar"
is that the life i want. or is
there some luck that might jus push my grades up
im going at a dumb rate. and seriously
i nid to find someone to go thru the
math questions with me, everyone's busy with their own work
now wad. and aidan's really busy with his stuffs
tis is the end isit?
so this is how the story ends, huh..
or a twist. yea a twist would be good.
everyone likes happy endings, but it's
unrealistic to haf a happy ending everytime.
someone has to die.
and it's gonna be me
im responsible for my own life and how it's turning out to be
amen.
You’re coming back down
You say you feel lost, can i help you find it
When you come around
From time to time we all are blinded
You’re coming back down
You don’t have to tell me what you’re feeling
I know what you’re going through
I wont be the one that lets go of you
I think its time to just move on
In the dark, on the phone,
You tell me the names of your brothers
And your favorite colors...I'm learning you.
And when, it snows again
We'll take a walk outside
And search the sky, like children do (I'll say to you..)
No way November will see our goodbyes
When it comes to December it's obvious why.
No one wants to be alone at Chrismas time.
Come January, we're frozen inside.
Making new resolutions a hundred times
February, won't you be my valentine?
And we'll both be safe till St. Patrick's day.
You really wanna hole me? show me, homie
So what do I have to say
Maybe I should do
What I have to do
To break free
Man
'N whatever happens to you
We'll see
But it's not gonna happen with me
iwasdisappointed
iwasdistorted
Back then
I thought you were just like me
Somebody who could see all the pain I see
But you
Proved to me unintentionally
That you would self destruct eventually
Now I'm thinkin' like the mistake I made doesn't hurt
But its not gonna work
'Cause it's really much worse
Than I thought
I wished you were something you were not
And now this guilt is really all that I got
i was always wrong
led into this sapphire
the mesmerising glow
like red burning fire
watch the reflections flow
lost in this facade
i shld haf ran away
will u let go and leave me all alone
running thru my mind, memories i could nvr forget.
i wanna relive those days.. with my frens
from j1 to j2, time flew jus by..
from a huge hockey clique which was simply beyond words
to a little town calld t27.5, till promos
bball 'trgs' the times we had at teckghee...
the struggles we had. the fun we tasted
winning things, the hockey competitions,
interclass bball, our very own 4x100m race..
the amount of Fs i collected in 2yrs, yea
the discovery of kaden the white nigga.
this aint gonna stop jus cos sch did.
im feeelin u guys, and everything was phat.
Every memory of looking out the back door
I had the photo album spread out on my bedroom floor
It’s hard to say
It’s time to say it
Goodbye, Goodbye
Every memory of walking out the front door
I found the photo of the friend that I was looking for
I miss that town
I miss their faces
You can’t erase
You can’t replace it
I miss it now
I can’t believe it
So hard to stay
Too hard to leave it
If I could relive those days
I know the one thing that would never change
Look at this photograph
Every time I do it makes me laugh
Every time I do it makes me
what makes the one to shake you down?
each touch belongs to each new sound
say now you want to shake me too
move down to me, slip into you
she sinks in her mind as she sheds through her skin
touch like taste like fire
hands to know what I no longer defend
hands to fuel desire
I'll be fine, you'll be fine
this moment seems so long
don't waste now, precious time
we'll dance inside the song
You say this is your life but where is mine?
How you gonna get there running no where
burn yourself out die too soon.
You see the world is only temporary;
everybody's scared that they'll be no one too.
How you gonna hold out when you sold out?
Life's a riddle, here's a clue.
You see, a moment's only temporary,
let too many go and you'll be history too
why is everyone mugging...??
who wants to come out to play?? =)
4wks left. well, i gotta achieve wad everyone else
has deemed impossible. 2yrs ago, it was the Os and
i was really slack, tis time round, i cant even
slack one bit, wad a big jump it has been in less
than 2full years. welcome to the melancholic world...
money talks, paper talks, no one cares if u really
walk or not...
but wait! i do...
don’t wanna be, stitched up out of my mind
Feeling, strung out, laggin’ behind
All, trapped in, can’t do a thing cuz I’m
Locked down
Stitched up, feeling the burn
All, strung out, I finally learn that
Trapped in, can’t do a thing cuz I’m
Locked down
That girls is flawless,
and I know I’m not the first one to think that
This is not the first, I sure won’t be the last
Spend my whole life looking behind the back
I just don’t think I’m up to that
Stitched me up, string me out
Trap me in, lock me down
Cuz im down and down and down
"A survey found that many more people favour governmental
help for the poor when the programmes are called 'aid to
the needy' than when they are labeled 'public welfare'"
amazing isnt it, but i guess it's damn true...
and seriously, poverty cannot be made history...
it's here to stay, like it or not...
"every idle word that men shall speak they shall give
account thereof in the day of judgement"
Stars looking at our planet,
Watching entropy and pain
And maybe startin' to wonder
How the chaos in our lives could pass as sane
I've been thinkin' 'bout the meaning of resistance
Of a world beyond our own
And suddenly the infinite and penitent
Began to look like home
take me by the hand, and dance with me.
and ill hold u, cos i nvr once had u.
but aint this all a facade
Maybe I've been the problem
Maybe I'm the one to blame
But even when I turn it off and blame myself
The outcome feels the same
I've been thinkin' maybe I've been partly cloudy
Maybe I'm the chance of rain
And maybe I'm overcast and maybe
All my luck's washed down the drain
I've been thinkin' 'bout everyone,
everyone you look so lonely
im really stressed out...
im falling sick rite now, and i really feel
like shit.. i really hate this whole thing..
i hate everyday since the start of the prelims..
i dont tink i had a good day at all since then..
mayb yday was fine, but i woke up todae, feeling
sick.. and everything isnt working out for me..
my studies, my life, my everything.. yea, i can
ustand the saying that u win some u lose some,
u gotta trade smth for smth. yea but somehow, im jus
losing losing and losing. that makes me a loser. thanks
when can i achieve smth that i can be proud off, its
not that i stay home and sleep and eat and bum around.
why do i not ever feel a sense of satisfaction.
the feeling that u've jus helped someone, the feeling
that u jus made someone's day, and the person is
really thankful. the feeling that u jus worked ur butt
off for a well deserved win. mayb im jus not doing anytink
right. mayb im asking for too much, but am i ever asking
for too much..?? well, i hope everyone is doing much
better, i really feel sorry to lotsa ppl..
i dont tink anyone njoyed friday nite, although matt
says he did, i guess deep down, i know it wasnt all
that interesting a nite. and i draggd everyone into
it.. im sorry for being late for the match too, the taxi
driver screwd up, but i gotta still blame myself for it.
im sorry for going late for service, im sorry to aaron
cos he ordered so much food and not that many ppl
went. im jus damn sorry for everything.
im really feeling like shit.
but dont i always feel like that?
When everybody's in and you're left out
And you feel drowning in a shadow of the dawn
Everyone's a miracle in their own way
Just listen to yourself not what other people say
When it seems you're lost alone and feeling down
Remember everybody's different, just take a look around
Welcome to wherever you are
This is your life, you made it this far
Welcome, you got to believe
That right here right now you're exactly where you're
supposed to be
Be who you want to be, be who you are
Everyone's a hero, everyone's a star
When you want to give up and your heart's about to break
Remember that you're perfect, God's make no mistakes
Maybe we're all different
But we're still the same
We all got the blood of Eden running to our veins
I know sometimes it's hard for you to see
You cought between just who you are and who you want to be
If you feel alone and lost and need a friend
Remember every new beginning is some beginning's end
Welcome to wherever you are
This is your life, you made it this far
Welcome, you got to believe
That right here right now you're exactly where you're
supposed to be
im jus damn dumb la huh.
or mayb im jus damn bloody lazy.
and easily distracted. come'on.
not been updating.
jus trying to be studying
why cant i luv books like others do..
i wanna be a mugger.. argh
spending all my time stdying at harbourfrnt tis wk
hope it's gonna help more than mid yrs
econs tml.
i jus hope i finish all 3 essays in time.
Back me down from backing up
Hold your breath now it's stacking up
Etched with marks, but I can deal
And you're the problem and you can't feel
Try this on, straitjacket feeling
so maybe I won't be alone
Take back now, my life you're stealing
Trust you is just one defense
off a list of others, you don't make sense
Beg me time and time again
to take you back now, but you can't win
Take back now, my life you're stealing
And when the memory slips away
There will be a better view from here
And only lonesome you remains
and just the thought of you I fear
it falls away
Found myself just the other day
In the backyard of a friends place
Thinking about you
Thinking of the crowd you're in,
What you're up to, where you've been,
Just thinking...
Now you think you're so damn fine,
You could rule the world,
No not mine,
I don't think so
God my fingers burn,
Now when I think of touching your hair
You have changed so much, that I don't know,
If I can call you and tell you I care
know the scene that you're in,
And the people that you've been with,
Just get to me,
But you think I'm not as cool
As you are so beautiful,
Who you foolin?
Well I'm here to tell you babe,
The game you're in is just a game
So damn pretentious
make your choices
be responsible for them
may everything run smoothly
and u reap the harvest that u riskd
never say never
impossible is nothing
anything can happen
sometimes u jus feel like this is it
or she/he is really the one
and chances occur. would u take the opporunity?
at least when u fail, u can say
i've tried. rather than letting it run
and regret later, to reminise the has beens
and could haf beens.
this world is full of surprises
but how we appreciate n decide what happens?
it's still up to Him.
Yesterday was hell
But today I'm fine without you
Runaway this time without you
And all I ever thought you'd be
That face is tearing holes in me again
but today I'm fine without you
Runaway this time without you
And all the things you put me through
I'm holding on by letting go of you
Why would i chase your shadow all my life
And be afraid of my own
I'd rather be with you
I'd rather not know
Where I'll be than be alone and convinced that I know
And when the world keeps spinning round
My world’s upside down
and I wouldn't change a thing
I've got nothing else to lose
I lost it all when I found
you and I wouldn't change a thing
No, you and I wouldn't change a thing
Everything I know has let me down
So I will just let go
Let you turn me inside out
'Cause I know I'm not sure
'bout anything
But you wouldn't have it any other way
we try to play God.
and when we try to do that,
we mess ourselves up
that's why life is a messed up
my life aint messed up,
it's f*** up.
but i didnt try to play God
i jus never tried anytink at all.
why is everything happening like this
things happen to friends around me
what a time to even occur. i hope everyone
gets over everything and done with, life
must go on.
mayb it's a easier said than done.
u win some, u lose some
welcome to the world.
full of choices, that we shldnt be making
the things that we can decide are things that
arent impt. the impt things arent decided by us
God didnt create me to be holy
he created me to sin n learn from to it.
Could you whisper in my ear
The things you wanna feel
I'll give you anything
To feel it comin'
Do you wake up on your own
And wonder where you are
You live with all your faults
Chorus:
I wanna wake up where you are
I won't say anything at all
So why don't you slide
Yeah we're gonna let it slide
Don't you love the life you killed
The priest is on the phone
Your father hit the wall
Your ma disowned you
Don't suppose I'll ever know
What it means to be a man
If there's something I can't change
I'll live around it
study study study study
study study
study study study study
study study study study
study study
study studystudy study
there's no night study available tomorrow.
like what the hell man. that is rubbish.
how am i suppose to mug then.. i cant study
at home for nuts. 2nites. howhowhow.
mayb gotta go out find some place to study then..
who wanna go.....
i received a letter for ns. and when that happens
usually it's not something good. yes it sux.
i tot like, ok mayb i must go pilot test too, cos
supposedly 100000ppl haf already gone n been choosen
for pilot. not bad, can skip sch, and pilot is like
quite a gd vocation i guess.
but noooo, it says, report to sembawang naval base.
at 730am. on 5th sept. like wad the shit man.
5th sept is the 1st day of hols. and u ask
me to go to sembawang which is like the other end,
at 730am. u tink ppl no life isit, zZzzz.
navy? that is disgusting, k mayb the pay quite gd,
but like afew hundred bucks, u do the toughest of
trainings, and if u are out at sea, i dont even get
to come home alot. im gonna go there, act stupid,
and jus do everything with 20%effort.
i jus wanna do my normal bmt and go into ocs.
dont put me under the sea.....
a hungry man is
an angry man.
Dont stop get ready drop,
turn around and make it pop,
Just drop, drop
woah..woah...
i like that
i like that
Girl freak that back
I'm ready to go,
on fire like a rocket
and im ready to blow
it's not been the best of times for everyone
we're all in rage, and really short fused
im all screwd up too
sorry for being a pain
im jus a really f up fren to haf sometimes.
sorry.
So why're you sad?
Don't you know that
It's you that holds my dreams and seems to always come back?
How do I live without you?
How could you walk away from this, just walk away from this again?
How do I live without you?
How could you walk away from this, just walk away from this?
welcome to dreamland
woke up at 8am, well, todae is world dont stdy day.
im quite sick of studying man, how to ppl actually
keep it up all day. some even for 2yrs straight.
for me, i salute this ppl, i wish i could be 50% like
them, tt would be good enough.
lets say ill jus start my wk tml again.
when to clementi to meet kaden, to play soccer with
weitin's cous team, ahahha we were rather late la
then the match started w.o us, was like a 8man vs 11man.
anywae, our team was quite bad.. ok at least it wasnt
that tiring. now ive jus rested at home for an hr, and
ive to rush off for the hockey match 3pm...
im testing the human body limits once again..
the last time i did that was in june for the youth camp.
i went for match, then back to camp.. i practically didnt
haf a second to rest, and ended up rather ill...
at least i hope todae aint as bad, jus gotta use
my secondary heart n lungs and steam engines. arghh...
run run run run run run run run run run run run run run
Hello lonely
How you doin' today?
Hello sweet thing
Why don't you walk this way?
Hello, you again
How could you go and be so cold?
She said "Goodbye sad man"
Cuz all this pain is getting old
Hello lonely
Now that you're gone I can move on
Goodbye sweet thing
Just know that I've been here all along